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    Dating an ungodly man

    Or mentioning their far-off distant relative who they thought might still be single (which they never were), and who they could maybe one day set me up with (which they never did).

    It became hard to find peace between the God that I loved and this aching, unmet desire to find a companion. It felt like God wasn’t listening, and I was discouraged that my life seemed stuck in a pit of hopelessness with no sign of movement anytime soon.

    There seemed to be 10 girls for every single available guy in church.

    Then there was the pressure of every person I knew asking about my relationship status every time I saw them.

    If there is always that possibility, then you must ask yourself whether this person has the qualities you will need in a husband. Ask yourself these questions: How strong is his relationship with Jesus Christ? How passionate is he about reading God’s Word, prayer, and fellowship with other believers in a biblically solid church? However, in Ephesians Paul compares a husband’s role toward his wife with that of Christ’s role toward His Bride, the Church, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, the she might be holy and without blemish,” (Ephesians -27, emphasis mine).

    You go to youth group, you love Jesus, you meet someone, you graduate high school, you get married, and as the fairy tales say, “You live happily ever after.” When I was 19 I was ready. At 27, I understood and accepted that God was using the last few years to prepare me for marriage.I never would have considered dating a non-Christian. In fact, “loves God and puts Him first” was always on the top of the list of what I was looking for. It started as impatience, but it soon developed into a rampaging beast of unbelief, doubt, and worst of all, hopelessness.It felt like everyone I knew was married, including the kids I used to babysit.And if he is not ready to be a husband, dating him could only have a sorrowful outcome.Marriage is a covenantal bond between a man and a woman where there is dependence—to a certain extent.

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